Koen's Dancing Debut!

Due to the snow storm last month, our church Christmas program was postponed until last night. Here is a video of the preschoolers (2-5s) performing last night. Koen didn't sing (although he knows the songs) but he sure did dance! He is the brown horse front and center. His buddy Isaac is the gray donkey just to the right. The thing in Koen's hand is a car that ends up being a distraction for Isaac who loves cars.

Christmas Highlights

Christmas was nice this year. It was such a blessings to have a White Christmas, even though it did disrupt most of our plans in the days around Christmas. I was forced to slow down, which I think I really needed. We spent several days playing in the snow with neighbors who were also stuck at home. We played games, made Christmas cookies, read a great book.......I still felt busy enough, just less busy than I would have been had I made it to all the social events that were scheduled.

Some Christmas cookie decorating with Koen's buddy, Isaac

We stayed in Washington for Christmas this year. It's nice to be at home and not have to make the long drive to Oregon on Christmas Day like we've done many times in the past. Keith's family went to Boston to celebrate, so we spent the time with my family. Christmas Eve was spent at my Mom's like always. We had a little bit of trouble getting there. We have two identical white Subaru Outbacks that do great in the snow. I headed north to get my Grammi from her nursing home, and Keith and Koen headed south to pick up my dad who was stranded at his house. On Keith's way, he dropped Koen at my Mom's, and then only a few blocks from the house the car broke down. Most cars were stuck in the snow, but our car decided it was time for the clutch to give out. Some nice people helped Keith move it to a side street, and he waited for Tripple A to come, only to be told there were no available tow trucks. That was fine though, because I was able to get him after I dropped my Grammi off.

Everyone arrived safely, just a little later than planned, and we had a good dinner. After dinner we headed to church, but it was a little dissapointing as our church had cancelled it's service. We tried a new one near by and the music was so loud it hurt my ears (makes me sound old, doesn't it!!) Oh well, Keith liked it. After that we spent a couple hours opening gifts, and had a Happy Birthday Jesus cake.

Koen and Grampa on Christmas Eve

A family photo in front of Grammi's tree- tradition.

The Dinner-L to R is Great-Grammi (92), Grammi (Kelly's Mom), Laurie, Kelly, Aunt Carrie, Grampa, Koen and Keith is the photographer.

The Happy Birthday Jesus cake- Koen got to blow out the candles, of course.

Koen's loving the new Cars slippers!

Our desire was to have Christmas morning to ourselves, but we were up so late Christmas Eve that we slept in really late on Christmas Day, and only had time for breakfast and stockings, and a little bit of enjoying the gifts we got the night before. In the afternoon we headed for my aunt's house for a nice open house gathering she has yearly.

Christmas Day we had a few hours are home to ourselves - all Koen wanted to do was play with his new toys, not open more presents. He particularly loved the new play dough set.

The newer tradition - a photo in front of our mini tree-on-a-table.
I made hats for the three of us.

Opening stockings (Look at that snow!!)

That evening we did what we're trying to make our tradition and drove around (or should I say slid around!) to look at Christmas lights with my mom. We went back home and opened a few more presents, and did our last advent (which Koen loved this year!).

Our new Advent tradition - with candles, The Advent Book, and the tree that gets an ornament every night. Koen enjoyed this, especially blowing out the candles.

One of Koen's favorite gifts - the 2 dollar pair of child scissors, was a necessity when opening every gift- weather it had a ribbon or not!

Koen getting to enjoy one of his new toys.

Koen got to the point that he was tired of opening presents! I think it was mostly because we wouldn't let him get some of the new toys out of the box, as he had plenty more to open and he needed to get it done. It seems like the cheaper, simpler gifts are what thrilled him the most: a glowing bouncy ball, a pair of scissors, and a flash light. He seemed to understand that we were celebrating Jesus' birthday. We didn't talk at all about Santa, and he didn't ask about him. We were able to focus on Jesus, and he talked about it often in the days leading up to Christmas. I'm so thankful for that. As Koen would excitedly say "Jesus was born!"

One cute story: One of the last gifts Koen opened Christmas night was a little box of train tracks that Keith had labeled "To: Koen, From: Monkey (Koen's favorite stuffed animal)." After he opened it, he gave Monkey a hug, said thank you and then asked us "What should we give Monkey?" Keith and I were trying to think of something to give Monkey, and Koen ran excitedly into the kitchen saying "Monkey needs a banana!" So, monkey got a banana for Christmas, and all were happy.

Merry Christmas

MERRY CHRISTMAS TO YOU ALL!
I pray the Lord blesses you abundantly in the New Year. Thanks for following our adoption journey.

*Another Christmas....

I was just wallowing in adoption self-pity when I decided to blog. Entering our blog and finding my last post titled "Thankful" makes me feel even more guilty for my attitude. I want to be more optimistic and hopeful.

Last year at Christmas time, we hoped and prayed and dreamt of having Liv home by this Christmas, or at least seeing her face by this Christmas. I had planned to make her stocking some time this year - it would be red. I have the material, but it can wait another year.

Lord, we are tired of this wait. Please fill us with hope. Please guide our steps, and bring our child home soon. Please guide us to her. Please protect her and comfort her - surround her with love. Prepare us for each other.

Longing

I feel tortured right now because we left Koen with family for two days while we started our conference an hour away. Keith drove to pick him up this morning while I was in a meeting, and I expected them to be in our hotel room when I finished. I was so excited, and now so disappointed. To top it off, I couldn't even get a hold of Keith on his cell to know where they were. I got my jacket on to go down to the lobby in hopes they were there, but my mother-in-law called and apparently Keith had yet to meet her, meaning, he is still pretty far away. I am bummed.

I wonder if this is what it will feel like when we get our referral. I want so badly to see and hold Koen, but I am stuck in this hotel room and can't get to him. It's totally going to stink!!!

So, on a happier note, Christmas was enjoyable. We got totally spoiled, a little too spoiled perhaps. Koen unwrapped his presents, along with some other people's gifts. He made it through two church services - not perfectly, but happily enough. We even had snow on Christmas day. The drive south on Christmas day was a little rough because of the snow, and it made for a very long day, but we survived. I'm not sure how many double Christmases we can handle in the future. We want so badly to just stay at home and relax and start a few of our own traditions. We could invite our familys, but we have so little space. So, we will likely; continue in what we've done, and end up totally exhausted after 3 days.

As we drove on Christmas day we read chapter two from Philip Yancy's The Jesus I Never Knew. I discovered this eye-opening chapter about the birth of Christ a few years ago and have made it my goal to read it on or before Christmas every year. What Yancy writes is good at giving some perspective to the real Christmas in the midst of a world that makes it about materialism, santa, a dream world.... The reality is that the two realms of existence : the eternal Heaven where God is, and earth where man is collided at this one point in time, and made a way for the salvation of man. Mary was a virgin who experienced the shame of a growing belly while being unwed - something that women of her time were stoned for!

Anyway, it's good to read, and really made us talk all the more about trying to avoid the Christmas the world offers next year, with santa, and reindeer, and all of the things that satan has used to distract us from Jesus. I'm not exactly sure how we'll do that, and I don't want to deprive our children of certain joys, but there is a balanced that we hope to find. IF you are reading this and totally understand, I would love to hear your ideas on some family traditions you have to focus on Christ during Christmas.

So, my parents' birthdays are both a few days before Christmas and while we were celebrating, Koen started saying "Happy Doo!" We think he is trying to say happy birthday, as he knew who he was supposed to say it to. I was kind of fun to then tell that we were celebrating the birth of baby Jesus too. He was saying "Happy Doo" on Christmas too. He's fun.

Today is our 6th wedding anniversary. Like every year, our special day is in the middle of this annual conference we are required to attend. So, the most we usually do is go out to dinner, and maybe a movie. But, our favorite thing is to get away. Two days before Christmas Keith surprised me with an Amazing Race style get away to a lake house about 1.5 hours away from home. We had a very nice stay, enjoying the quiet, the view, games (especially xbox's Dance Dance Revolution!) and time together without kids. Thanks Keith and happy anniversary!

Lots of Gifts

We were so totally spoiled this Christmas. Here are some pictures from our four Christmas celebrations:

Helping wrap presents

Koen with Great- Grammi

Christmas Eve at Grammi's

Christmas Day morning at home.

Christmas Day Evening at Gramma's in Oregon
Koen and his cousin Seth

Me getting more than I deserve: a very nice new sewing machine!

Keith getting more than he deserves: his sister's professional digital camera!

"Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of heavenly lights, who does not change like shifting shadows." -James 1:17

Christmas Happenings

Koen is having fun playing in the sink right now. He loves his step-stools and carries them all over the house. I’m kind of regretting offering him this freedom.

Once again we have gotten caught up in the busyness of the season. I really want to slow down and spend a good amount of time pondering the amazing Gift that God sent to earth about 2000 years ago. This is the time of year that I battle materialism more than any other time. Money has been super tight, but I love to give. We’ve had to cut back in gifts, and get a little creative, which isn’t my forte. And, creativity takes time. I feel like Koen needs more and more of my time. By the time he goes to bed I am exhausted, but can actually get a few things done. Then I’m up late being productive and don’t get enough sleep! I’ve got some kind of nasty cold – the kind that makes you light-headed and so weary. Koen’s a little stuffed up, but nothing major. Keith is still sleeping a little weird from his trip.

Our Christmas plans include a candle light service at my Mom’s church Sunday evening, then celebrating with my family at my Mom’s on Christmas Eve. That evening we will attend Keith and I’s church for another candlelight service. We usually open gifts late into the night, so we will likely sleep in on the 25th. We’ll have a few quiet hours to ourselves Christmas morning. In the afternoon we will go to my aunt’s house to see my dad’s side of the family for an hour or so, and then head south to be with Keith’s family in the evening. I hope that by this time next year we will have more family traditions of our own – to really take the focus off of receiving, and onto Jesus as Koen becomes more aware.

On the 27th, we have our annual Campus Crusade winter conference in Portland where about 700 students from around the northwest will come to learn and fellowship. Keith has a big role in the conference, being in charge of housing for all the students and staff. He will be busy. The 29th is our 6th wedding anniversary. We don’t usually get to do anything real big because of the conference, but we’ll see. We’ll leave Koen with my mother-in-law 2-3 nights, and then have him join us at the conference through the 1st, when we will finally head home and hope to regain some normality.

I do love Christmas, and am so thankful for God sending His only Son to live as a human, be our perfect example, and then go to the cross to save us from our sins. Thank you Lord for salvation, a personal and loving relationship with you, and for so many blessings in our lives. I pray you focus on His many blessings to you this Christmas.Koen in his outfit Papa brought back from Asia